Jesus is Crackers? - Video Clip | South Park Studios UK & Ireland

AND I'LL BE TEACHING YOU,SO THAT YOU ALL CAN RECEIVEYOUR FIRST COMMUNION !

ARE WE GONNAGO TO HELL ?

WELL, HOPEFULLY NOT.

THAT'S WHY YOU'RE GONNANEED TO RECEIVE COMMUNION.

AND AS LONG AS WE GET THISCOMMUNION THING, WE'RE SAFE ?

WHAT IF WE HAVEN'T REALLYDONE ANYTHING THAT HORRIBLYBAD IN OUR LIVES ?

YEAH, WHAT IFWE HADN'T ?

IT DOESN'T MATTER,BECAUSE WE ARE ALL BORNWITH ORIGINAL SIN.

NOW LET ME EXPLAINHOW COMMUNION WORKS.

THE PRIEST WILL GIVE YOUTHIS ROUND CRACKER,

AND HE WILL SAY,

"THE BODY OF CHRIST"AND THEN YOU EAT IT.

JESUS WAS MADEOF CRACKERS ?NO.

BUT CRACKERSARE HIS BODY.

YES.

WHAT ?

IN THE BOOK OF MARK, JESUSDISTRIBUTED BREAD AND SAID,

"EAT THIS,FOR IT IS MY BODY."

SO WE WON'T GO TO HELL,AS LONG AS WE EAT CRACKERS ?

NO, NO, NO, NO !

WELL, WHAT AREWE EATIN' THEN ?

THE BODY OF CHRIST !

OH, I GET IT, JESUS WANTEDUS TO EAT HIM,

BUT HE DIDN'T WANT USTO BE CANNIBALS

SO HE TURNED HIMSELFINTO CRACKERS AND THENTOLD PEOPLE TO EAT 'IM.

NO !NO ?

I CAN'T WHISTLEIF I EAT TOO MANY CRACKERS.

LOOK, ALL YOU HAVE TO KNOWIS THAT WHEN THE PRIESTGIVES YOU THE CRACKER

YOU EAT IT, OKAY ?

OKAY.OKAY.

AND THEN YOU WILL DRINKA VERY SMALL AMOUNT OF WINE.

FOR THAT ISTHE BLOOD OF CHRIST.

OH, COME ON NOW,THIS IS JUST GETTING SILLY !

ERIC, DO YOU WANTTO GO TO HELL ?

NO !THEN STOPQUESTIONING ME !

BUT NOW WE CAN HAVE COMMUNIONAND NOT GO TO HELL, RIGHT ?

NO, BECAUSE BEFORE YOU CANTAKE YOUR FIRST COMMUNION,

YOU HAVE TO HAVEYOUR FIRST CONFESSION.CONFESSION !

YOU'LL BE GETTING INTHE CONFESSION BOXWITH A PRIEST

AND CONFESSING ALL YOUR SINS,SO THAT GOD CAN FORGIVE YOU.

YOU KIDS WILL ALL HAVE TO GOTO YOUR FIRST CONFESSIONTHIS TUESDAY.

SO I WANT YOU ALLTO GO HOME TONIGHT,

AND THINK LONG AND HARDABOUT ALL YOUR SINS,

SO THAT YOU CAN TELLTHE PRIEST EVERYTHING.

Oh, sh-- !